Recent reviews by Videogame Retrostories

I remember gifting this game between friends as an in-joke just to get each other to play it, many hours were spent messing around trying to beat it., In fact, there was one time I spent a couple hours trying to cheat my way to the last level to see the ending in the original, I ended up messing around with the game files to get myself to spawn at the last level after having played through all the stages up to that point and exiting out. I even tried opening the game in cheat engine with the goal of trying to give myself noclip or something (I had no idea what I was doing, it did not work). Eventually I just caved and beat the last level just to see what was past it cause i was stubborn. Seeing a post saying that this game got a remaster 10 years later was surreal, and replaying it was quite the blast from the past. The new movement is cool too, and I think it would make for some fun speedruns.

This game is of course, not anything crazy, but I'll remember the words "Super Hipster Lumberjack" long after the last time I open this game.

10/10 game with a kinda nasty community.

UPDATE: with the release of some updates i think that the game plays much better, you can read the old review below but most of these problems have been fixed or otherwise toned down to an acceptable degree


This game was actually really good when i first got it, but after a few updates it became frustrating to play. To keep it short, the general issue is that the harder enemies are poorly designed which becomes very apparent on higher difficulties where more of them spawn. I think the worst offenders are the Fire and Elite Pumpkins. The fire pumpkin creates zones of flames around you in random spots so when multiple of them spawn it becomes nigh-impossible to exist without getting hit, especially when you have other ♥♥♥♥ trying to clap your cheeks. With the exclusion of that one 360-degree ring of orbs, the Elite pumpkins's attacks are HORRIBLE to deal with in conjunction with any other Ellie (except the barrel skull) as it just ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ BARFS projectiles into your face constantly. The 360-degree orb ring is the exception because its well telegraphed as it gives you quite a bit of time to prepare to dodge it.

Another problem with the higher difficulties is that enemies just have wayyy too much health. This is made 10x worse with the "regenerating enemies" and "resurrecting enemies" difficulty modifiers as what ends up happening is that you whittle away at an enemies health but then have to retreat because of other things pursuing you, then as soon as you try to return to fighting that one enemy its already healed itself a bit. Even when you DO kill the damn thing sometimes it just creates multiple copies of itself to spite you, to give a bit of credit to the game, these copies spawn with half health but that doesn't mean much when they just regenerate it back to full. You'll often find yourself spending upwards of 5~ minutes on individual islands (you must complete 28 islands to complete the run,, 56 if you want max rank). I've had runs go up to 2 and a half hours which is extra bad when you consider that the game requires you to passionately make out with your shift key and spacebar, what ends up happening is that my hands just hurt after a single run and I have to stop.

I'm also going to specifically mention the lack of replay-ability the game has, once you've completed your first run, you have seen basically everything. I know the dev is specifically working on this but i think he missed the mark very hard with the handling of the Desert biome. It should have been treated as an alternate to the Arctic with a chance to replace it instead of just being added as the 4th island you have to go through every time. The idea of "Looping" also feels very rushed and not well made, there's virtually 0 reason to want to loop other than to get achievements or get diamond rank on your weapon. Looping doesn't really have any exclusive content to it like a unique biome that only appears after looping or a new type of enemy, it just feels like a waste of time that I'm forced to do because the game told me so.

I guess a few quick things i can think of off the top of my head are:
-Keep it to 3 biomes you have to complete, any more added should be alt floors with a chance to replace its original or optional branching paths into exclusive content.

-Ban more than 1 Elite Pumpkin from spawning on the same island or telegraph those two attacks better.

-Rework the Fire Pumpkin and just make it do something predictable like summoning the fire zone on the player or maybe shooting a line of fire towards the player, just anything to make it so I'm not randomly backing up into fire zones that i didn't even know existed.

-Buff the Barrel Skull, it feels more like my teammate than an enemy i have to fight, often times you just keep it alive because the barrels it spews out burn everything else on the island. Give it new attacks or make the elites immune to its barrel fire.

-Fix the "anti-softlock" system the game has, you can very easily find a crevice or a hole on islands, sit there, and then wait until the game decides to explode all the enemies on the island. It does this without me even wanting it to, one time a giant ant just died suddenly because i guess i didn't give it enough attention. (P.S you can clip out of bounds in one of the desert islands, its the one with the small cave.)

-Give me a confirm prompt on looping, starting a new run, or going to the victory island, i don't think i have to explain why I'm saying this.

-Enemies that spawned as a result of the resurrecting modifier shouldn't also be able to benefit from the regenerating modifier.

-Tweak what types of enemies are able to spawn on individual maps, its downright CRIMINAL that fire pumpkins can spawn on that one ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ claustrophobic volcanic map.

Also there's a bug with turrets where they refuse to shoot at shielded enemies after i pop their shield.

7/10, a good game at it's core but a don't recommend from me. I'll gladly edit the review to a recommend if it gets better over time. If you happen to read this, notice that a bunch of tweaks and updates have been released, and its still marked as don't recommend, you can probably safely ignore this review and just buy the game anyways.

Great game but it gets a little stale after a certain point. Its made by landfall too so you know damn well they aren't adding ♥♥♥♥ to the game anymore. Cant complain though, especially for a game that's only 6 dollars and goes on sale for even less. Fun with friends, unless they're the sweaty type that takes games too seriously.

8.5/10, its pretty easy to mod too. I'm sure most people can figure out how to add their own custom cards to the game.

There is nothing inherently wrong with Among Us but the game is at its best when there's large amounts of people, but the problem is getting more than 5 mfs to all agree to play Among Us at once is annoying. Even if you DO manage to wrangle up 8 or so friends to play, all it takes is one guy that loves ghosting to ruin a game, Like most party games, highly dependent on the people you play with.

8/10, wish there was a built in voice chat. Oh yeah don't even try public lobbies, its like playing with a bunch of brain-dead childre- no, you ARE playing with a bunch of brain-dead children.

Average party game experience, un-fun with people who take games too seriously Etc. fun with people who just play games to chill. Has infrequent content drops too, its always nice to be surprised with an update after a while.

8.5/10, charming art-style.

it has a level editor

I love Terraria but i always find myself dreading the idea of starting a new run. Pre-hardmode is just so much lamer compared to Hardmode yet it feels like Hardmode breezes past you. There's so many things to do in the game but not much of a reason to go out of your way to do them.

9/10, has some of the best mods I've ever seen in a video game (#CalamityFTW).

smash 6 is looking great