Who I Main (…Or Do I? Maybe I’m Lying 😇)
Dead by Daylight

Ugh. I quit ages ago. The game sucks harder than a black hole made of bad balance updates.
But back when I did play:

Survivor: Bill & Alan Wake — grumpy old man and traumatized writer? Peak comedy.

Killer: Wesker — ONLY because throwing people around like ragdolls made me laugh.

Overwatch

I’ve mained like five different characters and lied about all of them at least once.

Old mains: Cassidy & Junkrat (explosions AND cowboy drama? yes please.)

Current main: Soldier: 76 — he’s just some tired guy with a gun. Relatable.

Mortal Kombat 1

Homelander
Not because I like him — because watching people rage when he wins is hilarious.

Left 4 Dead

Teamwork? In my game? HAHAHA—
Fine. I behaved here. Sort of.

L4D1: Bill

L4D2: Nick

Weapon of choice: Shotguns, always.
And no, I never sacrificed myself on The Sacrifice.
Why? Because I like living. And because making someone ELSE do it is funnier.

Payday 2

Dallas
He’s the leader of the crew, just like how I'm the leader to my extremely evil organization...! It makes lying and trolling teammates as him ten times funnier.

Nickelodeon All-Star Brawl 2

Mr. Krabs
Money. Greed. Capitalism.
He’s everything I aspire to be. 💰🦀

Don’t Starve

Wilson — Regular guy trying his best. Aww, pathetic.

Maxwell — Evil dramatic magician? Now that’s the energy.

If you see me in a game lobby, just remember:
I might help you, I might destroy you, or I might pretend to do both.
But either way…
you’re going to have a very interesting time. 😈