lil homie \/

good at the game

tricky

shhh

+rep
Met him after a clean ace on Dust2. His voice—calm, deep, like a guy who clutches 1v5s and writes poetry.
We queued nightly. Played smokes, shared skins, exchanged looks in webcam lobbies.
One night he asked, “LAN at yours?”
I said, “Full buy only.”
He showed up in cargos and a tight black tee, holding a Razer mouse… and something else bulging.
He walked in, tossed my headset, and pinned me to the wall.
“I’ve seen your spray pattern,” he growled. “Now let me show you mine.”
Felt his AWP against my thigh—no warmup, no timeout, just raw entry frag energy.
My knees buckled like Vertigo scaffolding. He moaned, “Planting…”
I panicked. Tossed a fake flash (empty Monster can).
One clean hook—1 tap IRL.
He dropped.
Turns out he was gay.
Still gave better comms than most my team. Wouldn’t trust.
But damn… I’d let him peek mid again.

regards, macaque izichi