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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⢄⡀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣆
⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⣀⠉⠉⠛⠛⠁⠀⣠⠦⣄⠀⠙⠦⡀⠀⠀⢹⠀
⠀⠀⠀⡼⠀⠈⢳⡀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠃⠀⠈⢦⡀⠀⠘⣆⠀⢸⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⠛⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢃⣠⣤⣼⣤⣟⠀
⠀⢴⡃⢀⢤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⡄⣀⠀⠙⡆⠀⠀⠀⢳⡀
⠀⢸⡃⠉⠀⠀⠲⠖⠉⠙⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⣎⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣇
⠀⠈⠉⢻⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠛⠋⠀⠀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢹⠀
⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡤⠖⠉⠉⠀⠙⢾⠇
⠀⠀⠀⠸⣦⠴⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢄⣤⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Oops!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠛⠛⠲⠋⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠞⠋⠉⠓⢦⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⢄⡀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣆
⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⣀⠉⠉⠛⠛⠁⠀⣠⠦⣄⠀⠙⠦⡀⠀⠀⢹⠀
⠀⠀⠀⡼⠀⠈⢳⡀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠃⠀⠈⢦⡀⠀⠘⣆⠀⢸⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⠛⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢃⣠⣤⣼⣤⣟⠀
⠀⢴⡃⢀⢤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⡄⣀⠀⠙⡆⠀⠀⠀⢳⡀
⠀⢸⡃⠉⠀⠀⠲⠖⠉⠙⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⣎⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣇
⠀⠈⠉⢻⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠛⠋⠀⠀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢹⠀
⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡤⠖⠉⠉⠀⠙⢾⠇
⠀⠀⠀⠸⣦⠴⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢄⣤⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⣰⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⢸⣿⣯⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⢼⣿⣿⣆⠀⢀⣀⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⢻⣿⠋⠙⢿⣿⣿⡀⠀⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⢸⠿⢆⣀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⢹⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⡀⣨⡙⠟⣩⣙⣡⣬⣴⣤⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀
⠀⠀⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣾⣿⣿⡇
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⢸⣿⣿⠿⠿⠛⠃
⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⢹⣿⢹⣿⣿⣿⢰⣿⠿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⢀⣀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠛⠓⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠉⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Don’t get me wrong though, the edit was still clean 🍷 but Tiki Phonk would’ve pushed it to another level entirely 🚀 The way those distorted beats sync with transitions is unmatched 😭 Every flash, zoom, and movement would’ve hit ten times harder 💣 The music basically gives edits an aura 👁️🗿 Like the second the beat drops, everything suddenly feels cinematic and dangerous 😈⚔️
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠏⢹⠀⠀⠱⡀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠘⠄
⣤⣤⡤⢤⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠃⠀⠈⠒⠢⢤⡀⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀🍒⣤⠤⢄⣀
⡏⠉⠒⠒⠤⡀⠉⠙⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢺⠀⠀⠀⣠⠞⢛⠛⠋⡈⡀⠌⢣
⠸⡀⠀⠀⢀⠎⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡖⠛⠲⠀⠀⠱⠀⠀⡎⠄⡁⠄⡁⠄⡀⠄⡁⠸⡀
⠀⠱⡀⠀⡎⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠨⠀⢘⠡⡀⠄⡀⠄⡀⠄⡀⠨⡎
⠀⠀⠈⠺⡇⠀⢀⡞⠉⠉⠂⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣹⡉⡩⢢⡀⠄⡀⠄⡀⠄⣠⠏⡅
⠀⠀⠀⠀⢇⠀⠈⠃⠀⠀⠀⣀⠜⠓⢻⠀⠀⠀⡰⠗⠉⠀⢀⡍⢦⣄⣤⣴⠟⠋⠀⡸
⠀⠀⠀⠀⢣⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠤⠜⠀⠀⠊⠀⠀⢀⠞⠉⠀⠀⠈⢣⣀⣠⠤⠚⠁
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡳⠧⡥⢦⣆⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠊𝙃𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙖 𝙉𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝙒𝙚𝙚𝙠𝙚𝙣𝙙
⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁
⢀⢀⢀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇
⢀⢀⢀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⢀⢀⢀⢀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠉⠙⣻⣿⣿⡟
⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⠟
⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉
⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿
⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡆⢸⠀⠀⡏
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢇⠀⠃⠀⢈
⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⠾⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⠿⣶⣤⣀
⠀⣠⡾⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⠤⢤⣤⣄⠀⠈⠙⢿⣦
⣸⡏⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⠾⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⣸⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣷
⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠙⠳⢦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠈⢳⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿
⢹⣿⣶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠳⠶⠶⠿⠋⠀⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⡀
⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠉⠙⣿⣧
⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠀⠀⢠⣿⡿
⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣶⣶⣿⡿
⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⠈⠉⠉⠁
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠁
⡎⢸ ⠉⠐⠢⢌⠑⢄ ⡸ ⡆ ⠣⠱⡀
⡇⢸ ⣀⠗ ⠉⠉⠁ ⠙⠢⠤⡀⢃⢱
⡇⠘⣄⢀⠔⠉ ⠈⠁⠘⡄
⢇ ⠁ ⠘⡄
⢸ ⢀⣀⣀⡀ ⢀⣀⣀⡀ ⢣
⡸ ⢴⣾⡿⠿⠽⠇ ⠘⠛⠛⠛ ⠈⢄
⠰⡁ ⢠⠒⠢⡀⠈⠒⠊ ❤ ⡠⢄ ⡘
⠱⣀ ⢀⠜ ⠇ ⢀⠔⠁ ⡏
⠑⠤⢄⣀⠔⠁ ⡜ ⠊⠁ ⢀⠜
⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⠾⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⠿⣶⣤⣀
⠀⣠⡾⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⠤⢤⣤⣄⠀⠈⠙⢿⣦
⣸⡏⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⠾⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⣸⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣷
⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠙⠳⢦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠈⢳⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿
⢹⣿⣶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠳⠶⠶⠿⠋⠀⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⡀
⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠉⠙⣿⣧
⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠀⠀⢠⣿⡿
⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣶⣶⣿⡿
⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⠈⠉⠉⠁
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠁
˖⁺‧₊˚˖⁺‧₊˚⠀ 𝐻𝒶𝓋𝑒 𝒶 𝓌𝑜𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓇𝒻𝓊𝓁 𝒹𝒶𝓎⠀˚₊‧⁺˖˚₊‧⁺˖
you are honestly so cool... notice me senpai
⠁⠄⢠⣴⣾⣿⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣷⣤⡀⠈⠉⠉⠄⠄⠈⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⢻⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣤⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⠋⢀⡉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠉⣉⡉⠉⠛⠻⢿
⣿⣦⣤⣤⣿⠟⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣩⣍⠙⣿⡇⢸
⣿⣿⣿⣧⣛⢠⣤⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠻⠟⣰⡟⢀⣼
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣇⠰⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⠏⢀⣾⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⣠⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢍⡲⢬⡿⠋⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⡉⠒⠻⠋⢡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣦⢌⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⢀⠮⣽⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿
⣿⡿⠟⢉⣀⣤⣤⣉⣉⣉⠛⠛⠃⠛⣉⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿
⢶⢻⣑⣒⢤⡀⠀⢄⠀⠀⡠⠀⢀⡤⣆⣊⡿⡷
⠀⠹⠹⣚⣣⠻⣦⡀⠀⠀⢀⣴⠟⣸⢓⢎⠏⠀
⠀⠀⢡⣱⣖⣢⡾⢿⣾⣷⡿⢷⣖⣒⣎⡎⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⣠⠓⢬⠅⡺⢻⡟⢗⠨⡥⠚⣄⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⣿⡆⠘⠆⢇⢸⡇⠸⠰⠃⢰⣿⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠐⡻⣮⣬⠞⠈⠁⠳⣤⣴⢿⠂⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⡜⠀⠁⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠈⠀⢣⠀⠀⠀⊹
⊹
So I collected 2.5 million fart samples (approximately 3 months of non-stop farting) and trained a neural network on them.
The results:
• It can identify your diet with 87% accuracy from a single fart
• It learned there are only 7 basic fart types (all others are combinations)
• It started generating "fart symphonies" that actually slap
• It predicted the stock market with 52% accuracy (barely better than random but still)
Most disturbing discovery: When I asked it to generate "the perfect fart", it created a 3.7 second sound that made my dog cry and my roommate move out.