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Luv you. <3

Thanks.

Over the past few months, I have donated every dime available to Bernie. I have picked up extra night and weekend shifts just to be able to show just how hard I feel the Bern. At one point I went over a week straight without seeing my family. My wife has threatened to leave me. I knew she meant it, so as my final act of defiance I went behind her back and took out a second mortgage on our house to help finance Bernie.
I knew my kids were to get free education under President Sanders, so I decided to use their

college funds to buy him 30 seconds of ad time. After all, college funds are about to become a thing of the past. When I stopped being able to give them lunch money, I started sending them to school with single pieces of Dubble Bubble: Delicious and nutritious!
Eventually the amount of money I pledged was becoming unsustainable. The bank finally foreclosed on our house. The wife had left me long ago at this point, so I was left on the street with no job (I quit to become a permanent phonebanker) and three kids to feed. Fortunately I knew that under a Sanders presidency, we'd have been getting fed and housed for free!
I just had to suck some old man's ♥♥♥♥ for money to feed the kids. I bought them each a piece of Dubble Bubble and used the rest to feed Bernie.
Then he dropped out.