Recent reviews by Trivial_Error

I came in expecting a nice relaxing experience.
what i got was blue balls
no ♥♥♥ slime to be seen
very dissapoint
-1/10

I would recommend this game to others.

This is quite possibly the best game ever made

The ad told me I couldn't last 5 minutes in this game.
I exploded ♥♥♥ all over the bottom of my desk in 6.
-5/10
Not as advertised.

This game gave me Carpal Tunnels and a rocking migraine.
The controls feel like they were designed by a ♥♥♥♥♥♥ who can't look up and my inputs feel like suggestions.
I would sooner be awake and watch as Michael J Fox attempts to surgically remove the head of my penis than to try and survive another night.
♥♥♥♥ coconuts and the tigers.
I wouldn't wish this pain on my worst enemy, but I do wish cervical cancer to the creators mother.
10/10 - Crunk like sparky rocks

The game is ok. It has the potential to be fun when, as the title suggests, you play with friends. And although I did enjoy the new world “Epstein’s Fun Island”, I found that the hole textures in this world were slightly offensive to the families of the children taken. I was also not expecting Epstein himself to do the voice acting and MoCap for your golf ball, although I cannot deny that it added to the experience.
Despite the concerning themes and rampant pornography (of questionable legality), I would remiss to ignore the well-rounded gameplay and exciting FPS action sequences.
As you are likely well-aware of already, the score is exquisite, some of Hans Zimmer’s best work in my opinion.
Looking forward to the prequel
7/10

I can't pull a Paul Walker into a tree.
2/10

I wish I spent this time with my children before the accident.

I could not consume copious amounts of store-bought wonderbread
1/10

Sneak up on a deer in cover 100m away, deer sees you and runs for miles. driving down the highway at 100km/h, deer gets in the way, looks blankly and stays still hoping i dont see him.
10/10