★Merry★* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •
•。★Christmas★ 。* 。
° 。 ° ˛˚˛ * _Π_____*。*˚
˚ ˛ •˛•˚ */______/~＼。˚ ˚ ˛
˚ ˛ •˛• ˚ ｜ 田田 ｜門｜ ˚ ☃
☆¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•.¸☆ ★ ☆¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•.¸☆

Why you gotta do Felix like that? Sure he sounds like he's on speed all the time, and I'm not talking about road side 5 dime a bag speed Félix 'xQc' Lengyel. I'm not talking about cocaine rush methed up Minecraft speed runner Félix 'xQc' Lengyel either. Hell, I'm not even talking about prime Overwatch pro player Félix 'xQc' Lengyel with the OWC '17 2nd place finish and his signature Reinhardt and Winston (with the abilities to 1v5 and being capable of both capping and defend point), equipped with his wooden chair, a perfect autism speak, control of the cocaine in his blood stream, with the first speed talker's DNA implanted in him so he speak in in 5th dimension and can perform speed runs while being an expert in all fps games and watching youtube videos

I sexually Identify as the "I sexually identify as an attack helicopter" joke. Ever since I was a child, I've dreamed of flippantly dismissing any concepts or discussions regarding gender that don't fit in with what I learned in 8th grade bio. People say to me that this joke hasn't been funny since 2014 and please at least come up with a new one, but I don't care, I'm hilarious. I'm having a plastic surgeon install Ctrl, C, and V keys on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "epic kek dank meme tran‎nies owned with facts and logic" and respect my right to sh‎it up social media. If you can't accept me you're a memeophobe and need to check your ability-to-critically-think privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.

I'm not Racist Because.... I ONLY use the Black skin tone on all my Emojis

I'm not Racist Because.... I use Dark mode on every App I have

I'm not Racist Because.... I only drink my Coffee BLACK

I'm not Racist Because.... My favourite super hero is the DARK Knight

I'm not Racist Because.... I ALWAYS play as Coach in L4D2

I'm not Racist Because.... I listen to Logic

I'm not Racist Because.... I voted for Obama

I'm not Racist Because.... My favourite Disney movie is The Princess and The Frog

I'm not Racist Because.... Miles Morales is my favorite Spiderman

There’s two things you need to know about me: I’m a 24 year old man and I love eating pu‎ssy. Seriously it’s my favorite thing and unlike most males, I don’t have much interest in blowjo‎bs or even sex. I’m also a writer and I realized I should stop trying to write the next great American novel and just write what I know....

So I wrote a nonfiction (but...flowery, I’d say) piece about eating pus‎sy. It’s not porn, it’s like modern day Anais Nin type intellectual sexual content. It’s also very feminist because there are men out there (nay, boys) who still have childish hang ups about French kissing a woman’s delicate rose. Apologies for all my various euphemisms. Like I said I’m a writer.

My parents aren’t even conservative but they got really uncomfortable after I had them read my piece. My mom said it was a bit too much for her. I asked her which part, and she said all of it but specifically pointed to a line (copy paste): “I slither my tongue through her sumptuous flaps, lapping up her golden honey with fervor as I feel her stiffening turtles head poking into my nostril.” She and my dad have always been supportive of my writing but they said this was “private” and they’d rather not read any more stuff about my sex life.

I have to admit I’M a little offended because this is my art and I also believe this is the piece that might actually be something. My dad draws in his free time and this includes nude portraits of people we don’t even know....so how is that ok but my writing isn’t?

Alas. The perils of being in a family of creatives lol. Anyway who’s in the wrong?