Stumbling home drunk from a party

Stop by a tree to take a leak

As I whip out my ♥♥♥♥ a mosquito lands on it and starts sucking it

Instant raging bonar from thought of someone sucking my knob

Mosquito flicking explodes from the blood bursting into my mighty sword

Basically got laid

You farted in the grocery store yesterday. You were the thick brunette with the furry boots that farted in the bread section last night. I was the light brown hair with the dad body next to you who asked, "Was that you?" You quickly responded, "No it wasn't me!" And seemed annoyed that I asked. As the stink grew & permeated my mask you continued to deny it, but it was totally you. I tried to get rid of the stink by waving two loaves of Italian bread around. You stormed off with an attitude. You are beautiful and even if you are a liar and fart like a man.. Its great weather & I would love to meet up.

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Last night, I dreamt that a baby started peeing on me and instead of dodging it and wiping it off, I just stood there and turned in slow circles to get fully saturated.

Sometimes🤑i get a little freaky at night😈 so i tiptoe out of my house without getting caught 😼and then i sneak up to one of the nearby graveyards🤫and start digging up the graves until the corpses are bare to broad moonlight and then i start urinating on them😳to relieve myself and then reburry the corpses again as if nothing happened

If your cream is too thick for your liking, you can always stir a little bit of the thin liquid back into your cream, until it reaches your desired consistency