Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the ♥♥♥♥” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.

*sniff*, he's been here...

You got games on your phone?

If I go outside, if I go outside with all these powers and... Bruh if I start going outside (I got a nice body), Bruh if I start going outside it's over for all y'all. Like I'm telling y'all that's why my mom is tryna keep me in the house. She wants to keep me in this ♥♥♥♥♥♥ crib all ♥♥♥♥♥♥ day. Cause she know that I got powers and she know that I'm gonna kill everybody. Like it's coming. I told her. I said I'm gon kill her. I told my mom I said I'm gon kill her. I told her she was worthless too. I told her I didn't care about her. I said I didn't like her. I said I didn't want her. I said I wanted her to die. My mom is a ♥♥♥♥♥ and she's ugly as ♥♥♥♥. But we ain't talking about her though. Like I said if I go outside I WILL destroy y'all. Y'all need to understand, outside is where I live at. If I start living outside I will kill all of y'all.

HALO is an allegory for Yugoslavia, in which Master Chief (Tito) fights an antagonist called the Covenant (Croats) with weird religious beliefs (Catholicism)

I'll even bake you home made lactation inducing biscuits to help you get to a point of hyperlactation syndrome so that you'll be seeping out multiple quarts of milk per day. Which I will save and drink just so that I can tell you how delicious it is. I'll make you so fertile that triplets will be the minimum number you'll be carrying at any given time. I would literally never stop doting on you, I would respond to you every beck and call and I would ♥♥♥ inside you again each time you ask for something. You would be so pregnant all the time that you would literally not be able to stand up straight anymore even after menopause. Your spine would be permanently bent out of shape to accommodate a pregnant belly. Even after you can't get pregnant anymore I would just keep putting more eggs into you. I would clone you purely so that I can put fresh eggs from the clone inside you after you run out of them.