quinn

There they stood. Like gods among the glowing sea of Silvers. The filthy Silver plebs looked upon them in complete awe. Each one of them the best players of North America, ready to take on the oppressive NIP regime, that has dominated the world of CS:GO since the ancient ages of Source. Their leader, Freakazoid, stood at the front. His chest buffed out like a 500-pound gorilla on steroids, and his veins bulging. This master-crafted player trained every day to be the top of his field. He would wake at 3:30 A.M. and begin his daily routine of pumping iron and CS:GO. He would consume three small baby goats and 10 pounds of straight protein. Then Nothing would come along to shine Freakazoid’s massive body. From head to toe, Nothing applied glistering jelly onto the blessed body of Freakazoid, resisting to touch what he was not permitted. This stress of desire often tore Nothing apart, as he would lay in bed in agony, pondering why such a cruel world would present him with the gift of Freakazoid’s godly form, yet not allow him to have it. All of this training had turned Freakazoid into a proficient CS:GO killing machine. They were ready, with Freakazoid in the lead. Ahead of them they faced the band of Swedish raiders, their meatballs dangling from their thighs. As the NIP onslaught paved through the Sea of Silvers, Freakazoid and his men kept calm, ready for the Revolution. They were to bring honor to North America, and restore the continent to its former glorious state, before the European disease ravaged the game. “NOTHING, PREPARE MY BODY” Freakazoid yelled, as the NIP hoard advanced closer, slashing down Silvers like grass. Nothing scurried over and quickly climb onto Freakazoid’s back, rubbing jelly between his hands. Nothing proceeded to apply the jelly onto Freakazoid in a sensational manner, enjoying every part of it. When the deed was done, Freakazoid grabbed Nothing by the neck and throwing him at NIP. This pleased Nothing, as his idol had put faith in him to entry. Charging in with the fear and spirit of his god (Freakazoid), Nothing entered onto B site, his heart pumping and his body ready. He lit Allu on spools with his AK-47, but got picked off by Friberg’s m4a4. Next Pretty-Boy and Shroud ran onto site, working together like fire and ice to kill Allu and Friberg. With site cleared, Freakazoid and Skadoodle pushed onto site, Skadoodle watching the flank with his massive AWP and imposing stature. Freakazoid planted the bomb, and Cloud 9 set in for the fight. Xist and Forest creeped their way onto site, like ninjas. Forest sprayed his m4 mag into Shroud, killing him instantly. Xist hurled a grenade at Freakazoid, who bounced it off his raging pecks back at the enemy. The nade went off, killing both Forest and Xist in one quick movement. Freakazoid let out a raging shout of victory, “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”. But his celebration was in pre-victory. The drums began to beat, the sky darkened, and the glee of Cloud 9 faded. Get_Right was coming. Using Nothing’s AK, Get_Right entered into B site. Using his Swedish power, he one tapped Skadoodle and stripped his huge body of his hard earned AWP. The situation was now worse. Get_Right flashed onto the main part of site, the light blinding Freakazoid as he ducked in cover. Unfortunately, Pretty-Boy didn’t have enough time to hide, and was dinked in seconds. The cries of fangirls echoed, as the face of beauty had been ruined. But Freakazoid didn’t have time to cry, for this demon of a player was close. With only 17 seconds left on the bomb, Get_Right emptied his remaining AWP bullets into Freakazoid’s hiding spot. His ammo gone, Get_Right let out a blood-curling screech and charged at Freakazoid with his knife. Knowing he had to uphold his honor, Freakazoid tossed out all of his weaponry, to face Get_Right like a man. But Get_Right was no man. This 7-foot tall, hairy beastly man ran on all four, his knife in his teeth. Freakazoid stood ready, the ticking of the nearby bomb going down. Get_Right lunged onto Freakazoid, knocking him over. Using his massive thighs, Freakazoid threw Get_Right off of him, and they both rushed to their feet. Baring his gnarly, brown teeth, Get_Right stabbed at Freakazoid, the blade penetrating his godly biceps. But like a god, Freakazoid pulled the knife from his bicep, and in one quick motion slashed at Get_Right’s neck beard. Landing this deadly hit, Get_right clutched his throat as blood poured from the wound. He fell to his knees and screamed. Then, falling head first into a pool of his own blood, Get_Right’s beastly body lay in its rest. Freakazoid dipped his head into this pool of victory, as he was now the champion. His shining biceps oozing out the blood of his stab wound, he was in sever agony. But this agony was #worth.