Okay so this may sound like I’m messing with you but I promise I’m not. I was recently diagnosed with a disease called cyroaudiovascularmalexia. Basically if I don’t get enough blood flow to my ears, they will slowly freeze and fall off and it will spread to my inner ear and brain. There’s no cure for it except one. I need to constantly warm my ears and the only material soft enough is the inner thigh of a thicc girl. So I need you to sit on my face for medical reasons.