Freddy the Spider, he died for us.

>finally bed this girl I've been pursuing for months
>ready to sleep, hope she doesn't the daddy long leg in the ceiling.
>girl asks "Is that a spider on the corner?"
>"oh yeah, he's been there for a couple of weeks. pretty chill guy, I call him Freddy"
>"I can't sleep with a spider in the room"
>"he just stays there, he doesn't move. he's harmless"
>"you need to get rid of it, I can't be in your room with that spider"
>"...erm...uh...ok"
>pick up sandle, reach the corner
>under my breath, "I'm so sorry Freddy"
>immediately regret my choice
>"good, I can get some beauty sleep now"