Double ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Double Dickers

Withdraw all your money in cash from your multiple bank accounts, get it all together and poop on it.

Give yourself big papercuts in all the crevices of your fingers and proceed to dip your hands in salt.

Stub your big toe over 50 times in one day.

Be told by someone in authority that you will never amount to anything in your life, ever.

Be a literal cuckold.

Get ♥♥♥♥♥-slapped by a man with rough hands once a day, for every day of your life going forward.

Undergo dramatic negative changes in your lifestyle that would damage your mind and body beyond repair.

Undergo a whole host of different forms of mental and physical humiliation; as in being spat on and told you are worthless.

Be forced to drink non-alcoholic macro-produced beer from the can, while every person around you drinks Trappist beers from exotic chalices for 10 hours straight - for the rest of your life.

Have a procedure done to reduce your IQ so that your new IQ falls within the range of down syndrome.