Welcome, heroes, to the Zero G Force. You are the finest and most extraordinary warriors in all the known universe, assembled here to counter the menace of the vile Doggles, interdimensional creatures of unspeakable malice come to Earth with one purpose: to bring mankind to its undoing. They are all around us, unseen and unheard, ever labouring to gee us all. Be on your guard. Look to your courage, and to the courage of the unfeasably muscular hero at your side. You are the best, the strongest, the brightest. Eggheart, Novaspawn, Bazman: stand fast, and we will prevail. I shall myself never be present for our desparate battles, as I shall be scottying it up with HL2 and a neverending stream of visitors at all hours who will give me an excuse to never play, however I wish you all the best.