TL;DR: due to drama surrounding one of the contractors who’ve worked on this game, I will probably no longer work on this game further. Depending on how Steam process my request, some of you may not receive refunds for your purchase. For this, I am deeply regretful and truly sorry.

Ultimately, I will no longer work on this game because my physical and mental health is such that it simply is impossible for me to do good work anymore. I’ve been unable to retain food, sleep and sometimes feel my limbs as stress responses to the situation.

This is a failure on my part. A strong developer would not be reacting like I do to things that I’m experiencing, and a braver developer would push through even if they did. Regrettably, I am both weak and cowardly. I am sorry.

For those of you who care about what happened, I will retell what I believe is an approximate version of events. To not bore you and as a part of my coping mechanism, I arranged what I know of the events in what is hopefully a slightly entertaining form. It may come across as glib or even smug, but I feel nothing but.

I hope you will be amused by taking part in what is perhaps the most short-lived early access game and this account of its history:

Dramatis Personae:

G - myself, the developer
S - the owner of the character “Seaworthy”
N - a digital artist
C - a client of N
B - a friend of C

Prelude:

Once upon a time G met S online. They became friends and agreed to make a game together, where G planned to work on the technical side of things and S on everything else.

So the work began. During this process several artists of different fields were contracted to provide artwork for the game, one of whom was N.

All was well, until N was commissioned by C not long before the game’s launch.

Act 1:

C commissioned N to make some artwork. After a span of silence had passed, C grew impatient of N’s complete non-response and asked for a refund. N refused.

Things escalated until N and C began taking hostile actions against each other. Among other things, N doxxed C and posted C’s information online, leading to harassment against C. N also asked C for money as ransom for the information posted.

C disappears from the internet, but not before letting B, a friend, know about some of the occurrences.

Act 2:

The game launched.

Immediately, B posted a negative review on the game accusing all involved in the game as N’s ally and guilty by association. B also posted information about Act 1 in the review.

G sees the review and is stunned by the information. Until now, nobody else working on the game had any idea of what N had done. G brings this to S and the two agree to remove N from future contracting and all of N’s work from the game.

G communicates this intention to B.

However, unsatisfied by the lack of immediate evidence of G and S’s dissociation from N, B demands to G that S should post something in public denouncing N.

G communicates this demand to S.

Act 3(?):

S refuses to make a public denouncement of N, seeing it as taking things too far after N was already removed from the game—an already costly decision. Furthermore, infuriated by the trouble caused by B, S block B on social media.

Seeing that these actions from S have unsurprisingly escalated the conflict between S and B, G despairs.

Afterword:

Okay. I’ll be serious now: I’m truly sorry to everyone who bought this game with the hope that it will grow as an early access title. As a developer of the game, I was completely unaware of how woefully unfit I was to dealing with the difficulties surrounding, and not within game development.

I will spare you the details, but C and in some ways N have both been subjected to horrible treatment from each other and other people online. I myself had only received the secondary anger of B, and this alone was enough to destroy me.

I know what I had to deal with was the last and least of everything, but I am weaker and more cowardly than I thought was possible—even looking at the development interfaces makes my body go cold and my gut twist, and the things said to me echoes in my head over and over whenever I’m not forcing myself to think of something else. I can’t imagine myself being a competent developer under these conditions.

As such, I will no longer work on this game, at least not for the foreseeable future.

Finally, I will make my cliche but necessary apologies:

I’m sorry, S, I could not be strong enough to overcome my own anxiety to finish the game we started. I will never forget what you’ve done for me, but I fear that this will only be the beginning of conflicts to come, and I do not have the strength to endure them.

I’m sorry, B, I could not help you obtain justice for your friend. I was too hesitant and emotional, and I’m sorry that in some ways I’ve become your antagonist. Although you may not believe me, I’d like to think that I sympathize with what your friend must have gone through, even if what I felt must only be a fraction of your friend’s suffering. I hope something can be done to truly help your friend.

At last, I’m sorry, dear player, I’ve failed my first duty to you as a developer. Because of my incompetence, you’ve not been nearly compensated enough for your money. As an early access title, you’ve bought this game with the hope of it becoming something better than what you first received, and I’ve disappointed you. For this, I am deeply ashamed. I’ve requested Steam to refund your payments if possible, although I can never repay the trust you’ve put in me, however little that might be, and for that, I am sincerely sorry.