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𝖧ᗩᙀᘍ ᗩ ᑎ𝖨ᑕᘍ ᗞᗩ𝖸!
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*──★──ＡＮＤ ＨＡＰＰＹ ＮＥＷ ＹＥＡＲ~!──★──*

I’ve been thinking and remember in the season 2 of Spongebob, episode 22b, Bossy Boots, when Pearl remakes the Krusty Krab and makes it hip and she wants Spongebob to serve salads but he doesn't know how to make one? and Spongebob, confused, asks himself the now iconic question; “what the heck is a sal-ad?". Well, in season 1, episode 10a, “Culture Shock”, (24 episodes later), Mr. Krabs hosts a talent show and at the Krusty Krab’s free SALAD BAR, people start throwing tomatoes at Squidward. How could Spongebob claim to have no prior knowledge of salads or what they are or how to make them or even know how to pronounce the word if Mr. Krabs has had a salad bar in the restaurant since almost day one? This all fits in with my theory that Mr. Krabs is a sith lord who’s been messing with Spongebob’s mind, periodcally erasing his memories and taking advantage of his naivete in order to gain a foothold on the public of Bikini Bottom through spongebob’s fry cook skills!

I was sitting at my computer one night enjoying some German Dungeon Porn. When my mother walks in: there was silence, nothing moved. After what seemed like eternity she approached me and said go upstairs or you will be late for the anniversary for the first time you masturbated. I nodded and went upstairs in the middle of my living room stood a large cake covered in rainbow sprinkles and pink frosting. Breathlesly I approached donning my masturbation bib. However as I got within three feet of the cake It burst apart in a shower of Rainbows and dirty prostitutes. From the epicenter of the explosion arose a naked Morgan Freeman. He turned slowly to me and said "come here boy take my hand." I swallowed and grabbed his hand, and he transformed into a glorious black panther. He told me to hang on and he would show me the universe. It was the greatest anninversary of my first masturbation ever.