Recent reviews by nina machina

- Mysteriously appeared in ice world, need to find keys to the airplane that I arrived at the ice world with

- Hopped down a ladder, find a grapple gun chilling on a wall next to a priceless artifact

- Grapple my way down two floors

- Slap a penguin to death

- Loot corpse

10/10

-"Accidentally" kicked some guy while buying a crack pipe
-Guy gets mad at me, pulls out pistol
-Taze him until he faints
-Piss on him, so he starts vomiting
-Hack off his head with a shovel, watch him vomit out of his neck while his head rolls away
-Create gas line from guy to several cars and other people
-Light on fire, watch several cars fly in the air and smash other people

Later:

-At area with police station, anti-videogame parents start shooting at me
-Police notice, start firing at parents
-Shoot rockets at the policeman and all of the parents
-Police and National Guard are now on my ass
-Fire napalm at them, lighting all of them on fire
-Storm police station
-Kill guy at ticket counter
-Run through with a machine gun
-Find the supply room
-Steal police uniform
-Kill all policemen
-Hide until wanted level drops down
-Go to trainyard
-Cop starts firing at random civilians, remarking to me about his adventures in police brutality
-Join him in shooting civilians
-Other police officer appears, shoots at me several times
-Fire machinegun like a madman at them
-Original police officer comes up and arrests me

10/10

This game is bad. REAAAAAAALLY bad.

Imagine the ice level from Mario. Moving around in that level sucks, doesn't it? You're always slipping around and what not.

Now imagine if that was EVERY LEVEL IN THE ENTIRE GAME.

Speaking of levels, EVERY SINGLE LEVEL is depressingly generic. They usually revolve around one mildly infuriating pattern that is repeated indefinitely until the end of the level.

This entire game is depressingly generic. "Super Pixalo". It's YET ANOTHER tile based platformer with pixel art graphics.

It doesn't even feel like it belongs as a PC game. Look at the layout of the menus and levels and such -- this game clearly belongs as an iPhone game. And not a good one, either. I'm talking those ♥♥♥♥♥♥ platformers from 2009 where every level is short and is divided into episodes, and every level has a collectible in it, which is *exactly* what this game is.

10/10; would go across a shaky drawbridge that is infested with dragons and hanging over lava again.

Best game ever. Great soundtrack, awesome story, fun as hell.

Before I start, let me say this: I only have 28 minutes of time on this game due to a computer crash and all of the time was lost due to Steam force quitting. Okay, now for the start of this review: This was one of the most fantastic experiences in my entire gaming career. It's hilarious, spitting out cleverly worded dialog throughout the entirety of the game. There are so many things to do in the levels of the game - and that's where the game falls flat. If you just want to get through the story, it will surprise you with how quick it ends. It's about three hours long. BUT you can forget all of that - because there is TONS of extra content just beneath the surface of the game. What Jazzpunk reveals to you barely scratches the surface - there are tons of minigames that you can find and do (a great example are all of the little nooks and crannies in the Kai Tai Resort level you can find by just running around and clicking on things, which include a small little Quake minigame, first person Fruit Ninja, and a Street Fighter II car smash parody). Another thing is the art style - the cartoony feel you achieve from this game. Even on lowest graphical settings, this game looks absolutely fantastic due to the rather simple shapes and shades of the objects. The cartoony environment as well as the comedy combined with the story that seems serious in its own right is fantastic, giving you a sort of contrasting feel, but don't get me wrong - that contrast is fantastic. For every minute - no - second I was playing this game, I enjoyed it. Even on a 2009 Macbook - it runs at 60 FPS on the highest settings. Another great thing is the joystick support (which I won't delve in to). Anyway, great plot, great graphics, and especially great humour. Let me close with this - This is the best game I have ever played.