Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smooth bore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.

The 100 Steam award like Hundred Line Last Defense Academy.

dude these new steam awards are so ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ funny it makes me want to merge without looking

THE NEW STEAM AWARDS AR E SO UGLY.

Boom. New Profile Award for you.

✧✧✧🏆⚡🏆⚡🏆⚡🏆✧✧✧

🧡 𝙇𝙚𝙜𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙧𝙮 𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮𝙚𝙧 🧡

🌌✨ 𝙇𝙚𝙩’𝙨 𝙨𝙦𝙪𝙖𝙙 𝙪𝙥 𝙖𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙨𝙤𝙤𝙣 ✨🌌

💥🌠 𝙈𝙖𝙮 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙙𝙖𝙮 𝙗𝙚 𝙖𝙗𝙨𝙤𝙡𝙪𝙩𝙚𝙡𝙮 𝙢𝙖𝙜𝙞𝙘 🌠💥

🔥⚡🔥 +𝙍𝙀𝙋 — 𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙛𝙞𝙡𝙚’𝙨 𝙝𝙤𝙩! 🔥⚡🔥

✧✧✧🏆⚡🏆⚡🏆⚡🏆✧✧✧

So True!

agh. agh. agk! ough! heurgh!!

whats nine plus ten

Joker Poker Balala

Love and peace !!!

Adri. Adri it';s him. He keeps knocking. Please help me I'm so scared. He..he's here. Oh god. Oh god, Adri helkp me it's EITO AOTS-

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After a good game I added him because he seemed like a cool guy. We hung out for a few months and became good friends. Lots of banter, lots of great CS and most importantly true friendship.
I invited him to my house for a cs lan party. He said he would come so I was looking forward to meeting him in real life.
When he arrived at my house he pushed me against the wall and started nibbling on my ear, I felt his hard ♥♥♥♥ slam into my leg. I punched him and then knocked. Turns out he was gay. Don't trust this guy.

Please Adri I'm so hungry. I need meatballs. Adri...ADRI..PLEASE I NEED MEATBALLS. I'M TAKING DAMAGE,. ADRI !!
\]]

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣮⣵⣄⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢾⣻⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⡀⠀
⠀⠸⣽⣻⠃⣿⡿⠋⣉⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⡟⠉⡉⢻⣿⡌⣿⣳⡥⠀
⠀⢜⣳⡟⢸⣿⣷⣄⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣠⣼⣿⣇⢸⢧⢣⠀
⠀⠨⢳⠇⣸⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⡟⢆⠀
⠀⠀⠈⠀⣾⣿⣿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣿⠐⠈⠀⠀
⠀⢀⣀⣼⣷⣭⣛⣯⡝⠿⢿⣛⣋⣤⣤⣀⣉⣛⣻⡿⢟⣵⣟⣯⣶⣿⣄⡀⠀
⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣾⣶⣶⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣧
⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⡿

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⢷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⢧⡀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠃⢘⣷⣀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣄⣀⢸⡏⠈⢷⡀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣬⣷
⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠸⠗⢹⣿⡟⠰⠷⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⡇
⠀⠀⢐⣒⣺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣀⠀⣀⣼⠛⢷⣄⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣉⡁
⠀⠀⠀⠤⢺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠢

MAIL? Like... a MAN ??? On MY property??? I feel I am owed financial compensation.

I've come here today to discuss your car's extended warranty.

drienTheMan
Adrien 'Hjönk' 'The Man'   Chad

Уровень 42

Spammer
100 ед. опыта
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im like always on invisible but ill reply
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Hello. I'm a salesman, sorta giant. I sell Molly and Mary and other various items. One time one guy came to where I was residing,

little diddy

⢀⠔⠉⠉⠢⣀⠔⠉⠉⠹⣦
⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠇
⠡⡀ Little kitty ⣼⡟
⠀⠈⠢⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⠋
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠲⣦⠞⠋
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠠⠂⠉⣴⣿⠏
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠊⠀⢀⡤⠞⠛⠋⠉⣩⣿⡿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠊⠀⡠⠞⠁⠀⠀⣀⣴⣾⠟⠋
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡠⠒⠉⠁⠀⠀⣊⣀⣤⣴⠿⠛⠋⠁
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠊⠀⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡆
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⠇
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠳⢦⣄⡀⠀⠠⢴⣅
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠀⡔⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣉⡻⢦
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢁⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⠉⠀⠀⠀⠻⡄
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡘⠀⠀⠀⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⠦⣄
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠁⠀⢀⣴⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣨⣤⡿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⠶⠖⠋⠀⠈⠻⢶⣤⣤⣤

Did you know the rot consumes?

Phillip! im so glad to see that you are in good health! how is your aldi business going? either way i hope its going well considering how the ligma virus is heavily effecting a lot of people currently. hopefully everything is going okay with Aaron, well i hope you have a good night!!!

your friend,
Candice

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ʏᴇᴀʜ, ɪ'ᴍ ᴀ
𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐑 ʏᴇᴀʜ, ɪ ᴇᴀᴛ
𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 ᴛʜᴀɴ ᴍʏ
ᴅᴏᴄᴛᴏʀ
ʏᴇᴀʜ, ɪ'ᴍ
𝐆𝐎𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐎
𝐄 𝐀 𝐓

Hey, Gordon! The Citadel's on full alert! I've never seen it lit up like that. Get out of City 17 as fast as you can, Gordon! Take the old canals, right? They'll get you to Eli's lab. It's a dangerous route, but there's a whole network of refugees and they'll help you if they can. I'd come with you, but I've got to look after Dr. Kleiner. Oh, and before I forget. I think you dropped this back in Black Mesa. Good luck out there, buddy. You're gonna need it.

JESUS CHRIST STARS ALMIGHTY MOTHER MARY UP ABOVE, WHY DID YOU DROP THE NUCLEAR JACK FROST BOMB ON MY STEAM PROFILE ?? ?? ?

Heeho

This guy is not real

As a Yakuza fan, I thought it was nothing but necessary to go to Japan to live the same life as Kiryu-Chan. Upon arriving, I was dreadful. There was no funny eye patch man, and the real yakuza blew out my kneecaps. I limped over to a local massage parlor (in hopes of going on a cool journey like Majima did in Yakuza 0). They looked at me and said "What the ♥♥♥♥ are you doing, this is not a doctor, we're calling immediate help" when I was in that ambulance, I understood what it meant to be Yakuza, and I look foward to returning to Japan to go beast style (Yakuza 0 - Yakuza Kiwami 1) and defeat the guys who shot my knees.

oni

ao

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ╱╲

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ𝙷𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚊 𝚠𝚘𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚏𝚞𝚕 day
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤAdded you for future games
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ+Repppppp

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ╲╱

sticking out your gyatt for marizzler, you're so yukkuri, you're so danmaku

You so skibidi!!! You toilet!!!

i have an iq of roughly 225, rounded up .3333... (it’s 224.666666...) Ive been called, “genius”, “brilliant”, “intelligent”, “quite smart”.. you name it. Ive had my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ by stephen hawking, a reknowned sapiosexual, and by many other sapiosexuals who are now unable to get turned on without my presence as my intelligence was simply to potent. at 9 year old i had already taught myself, among other things.. A big robot building. all the symbols in Neon Genesis Evangelion. designed a real life crash bandicoot more iontelligent than most humans. Ive cut open a brain and eaten pieces to learn there intelligence. so shut the ♥♥♥♥ up. compared to me you may as well be the stupid ♥♥♥♥ on the road, the “smelliest turds in the toilet” so to speak. yet i keep silent because although i am the intelligentest.. i am humble and dont create hate with others. im currently 15 years old and have just graduated my third ph.d. Shut the ♥♥♥♥ up.. and show some respect for me..

ahm geoduud....

═══════════ 🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱═════════════
🧡 Cool Guy 🧡
⚡⚡ Let’s be friends for future games ⚡⚡

🌟🌟 Have a wonderful year🌟🌟
💫💫 Stay safe & take care💫💫

🔥🔥🔥+REP The profile is fire 🔥🔥🔥


════════════🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱═════════════

You look like you watch skibidi toilet.

i love eating shrimps

how mahy shrimps u have to eat
before it make ur skin ton pink?

( ´･･)ﾉ(._.`) dont drink alcho dumbaass u r shrimp

wha y so crazyyy

my shell smells like shrimp

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───▄▄██▌█ beep beep
▄▄▄▌▐██▌█ you are deranged & homeless
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