Recent reviews by Road Man Stan

This is a very astonishingly good indie game.
The winter survival mechanics that are built in are super nifty, and they're adding more and more cool stuff with each update.
I recently played it after not playing it for a few months, and they updated so much! I can drink out of a toilet now!

I told somebody to sign my petition or I would follow him home and kill his dog and he ran away screaming.

People don't get me.


10/10 cats, would violate again. Worth every penny.

I thought it was all over when I accidentily shot a Squire in the face.
I thought it was all over when I hid under a structure from the Balloon only to find out the spotlight is made of magic.
I thought it was all over when I stepped in my own bear trap after I put down an alarm clock.
I thought it was all over when I got shot in the face by a robot talking about concealing secrets from his wife.
I thought it was all over when I lost my fake British accent.

But then, when all hope was lost, I got all the pieces to the Stone Circle and went home.

8/6 broken shotguns, would get hunted again.

Having not played any Serious Sam games previously, the storyline of this game struck me as a bit odd. But, ALIENS!!!

Excuse my language, but this game is seriously ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ awesome.

The character, the stunning graphics, the oldie shooter feel, the over the top gore, the awesome co op, the AMAZING soundtrack (which I've painstakingly learned to play on guitar), and everything about this game makes it deserve a 9/10.

The reason it's not 10/10 is because of some issues with the multiplayer deathmatch mode and some level design stuff.

This game is a beatifully designed addictive advancement in Simulator Technology™
The optimized graphics and giant map design give a real sense of immersion for the player as they pilot balloon powered airships through vast landscapes ranging from mountains to deserts to ruined cities. Finally, the real time Airship Helm Controls™ and those post-processing effects make this game the best Airship Simulator™ out there.
But that still begs the question, what is the game about? Why are you flying airships? A man named Birgirpall says it best.

Airship Simulator™ is a turned-based sci-fi steampunk RPG in which you play a retarded 17th century pedophilic vampire who likes little girls and hates seeing things. Not really. It's actually a team based airship game with customizable air balloon ship things. But my version sounded more interesting. The game has 3 playable classes; a Steering Wheel, a Bullet, and a Wrench. Although, I've never actually seen anyone pick the Wrench because all you do is hit things that are on fire until they are no longer on fire, and who wants to do that?

The Bullet, or the gunner, is the dude who joined the team first, and called dibs on it, and he's the only one allowed to use any of the guns on the ship, or else he'll tell his mom. The Steering Wheel is whoever was dumb enough to join second, and has to steer the gigantic whale carcass around, or the gunner shoots teammates for fun. The objective of the game is to tolerate your idiotic teammates longer than your enemy until they all disconnect, and you win imaginary internet points.

In all seriousness, I'd give this game an 8.5/10. There could be a bit of fine tuning with the server system so there isn't so much lag, however, that could just be my internet.

Hotline Miami in a single sentence:

In a colorful and trippy 1989 Miami, following the orders of three strangers in animal masks, your character, Jacket, solely motivated by the messages left on his answering machine, wears animal masks and wipes out countless waves of white suited Russian men in the most brutal ways imaginable set to the catchiest soundtrack of all time.

10/10