I bought a bidet.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEthItoc7J8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5mWwQuSeI3o&feature=youtu.be

So I went to go see the new batman movie.

I went to the concessions and asked for a Coke, but the dumb ♥♥♥♥♥ at the counter said "iS pEpSi OkAy?"

I told her, "if I wanted a Pepsi I would have ordered a Pepsi!"

https://youtu.be/hcOY-bIz90U

https://youtu.be/qjklfGi6aC0

https://youtu.be/aFdE__2OKc8

https://youtu.be/DO2a5HbfQgI

https://youtu.be/AP7utU8Efow

https://youtu.be/shCYA2J-De8

https://youtu.be/7rGKXner5Ig

https://youtu.be/Cv9k9tzQaOo

https://youtu.be/D-uM3GLZd9w

https://youtu.be/V-Cwd11I9w8

https://streamable.com/p4229

https://youtu.be/iUJ8r4ReHog

https://youtu.be/_htnaGN8eOs

I dreamt my cat was screaming for its mother.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZgUhN_sF6E

why is there crust on my keyboard?

I ♥♥♥♥♥♥ fired a load that broke my window and took out a bald eagle a mile above my house. I'm not going to get in trouble for that right? Anyways, just know your Grandma can see you jerking off from Heaven.

You can still TRY a backflip if you dont have legs

ALEX MISKA... wtf

Hello friend, plz subscribe to new YouTube channel.
https://youtu.be/GVH2gwsA10Y

https://youtu.be/dzX_OKRlqzI

The world is being controlled by interdimensional shape-shifting child molesters.
You have been warned.

FYI 2 dudes CAN make a baby, it just dies extra early in a butthole.

I got two balls and a big fat weineroni way up in the air

Ohhhh yeah baby (_))=====D I'll bounce to my boys ♥♥♥♥ for 3 hours straight while he did a reach around, it's all good tho because after he was finished piledriving my prolapsed anus and secreting every body fluid he could (sweat, ♥♥♥, tears and blood) into my strawberry donut sphincter, he quietly whispered "no ♥♥♥♥" into my ears, knowing it was all for brolove.

god

we're the tunnel snakes
we rule

HAPPY 18TH ♥♥♥♥