Recent reviews by Spider Man Juice Box

Hey, so where's my bundle that I just bought?

Release the damn game already

No.

When you get shadow banned only to have it lifted 2 hours later because of a false positive.

Everything for $12? Very good
Everything for more than $12? Not very good
Only worth buying on sale

Very relatable.
Very painful.
I am not ok.

Anti cheat so good, it detects wallpaper engine, steam streaming, anti virus, and youtube as cheats and force closes the game.
10/10 Would crash non stop for 3 hours again

Billions must be fired so that Pete Parsons can buy $2.3 million in cars

Can you guys just fix your ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ game rather than creating 6million hotfixes that just ended up breaking something else. For a game with so much potential, you guys manage to somehow wipe your ass with it, or should I say with everyone's money.

Patch 1.2 is out and Jesus Christ they dropped the ball...ONCE AGAIN
One is none is still broken, Incursions are STILL teleporting players bac (This time it happens even if it is just started GJ), map is now bugged, there are INVISIBLE walls in the ♥♥♥♥ Zone, still haven't fixed the damn dialog box "You have new master mods" after weeks of that being there, and the cherry on top...
THE GREATEST THING IS THAT NOW PLAYERS THAT KNOWINGLY OR UNKNOWINGLY PlAYED WITH A HACKER ARE NOW GETTING BANNED, SO A BAN WAVE CAME THROUGH ATTACKING LITERALLY ANYONE THAT EVEN SO MUCH AS UTTERED THE WORDS "Pls don't be hacking" GOOD ON YOU DIVISION, YOU ARE TRULY GIVING A NEW MEANING TO BEING MENTALLY HANDICAPPED.

A few weeks ago when the game first dropped, I was hyped so it would have easily gotten a 9/10 from me, but that's no longer the case.
To be honest, the game started out nicely with the introduce of the base of operations and ♥♥♥♥ like that. But the way they put you in the game...they put you in as if you've never clicked a mouse or used a keyboard in your life.

The game is broken to hell and back. It's as if they couldn't be ♥♥♥♥ed to fix the game, a title that was broken at LAUNCH, now this is Ubisoft we're talking about, and I'm ashamed to say it but I had faith that they wouldn't ♥♥♥♥ up this idea of a post apocalyptic New York.

People that were able to hit level 30 and get the Midas before the first patch, they were basically invincible if they had survivor link and the correct roll on the Midas, this was patched soon after word got out, good on you Massive, but wait, THERE'S MORE THAN JUST ONE BUG!

Textures were ♥♥♥♥ing up left right and center.

Physical areas sometimes wouldn't load in, causing people to fall to their death through the ground.

Bulletking...

There are so many cheaters to the point where it has gotten TOO out of hand, with no anti-cheat and a broken report system, it's free range on literally everybody and it is almost impossible to go in the darkzone without finding a guy that won't put his fist in your ♥♥♥ through a wall, using aimbot, and 10000 rpm.
P.S. with the report, you need video proof of said person doing it, so I hope you've got shadow played my dudes

The missions are completely copy and paste and offer little to no team work sometimes.

Missions can be farmed 24/7 (Lincoln tunnel and Lorraine mainly).

The incursions were brought it as something of a new way to bring players together to work as one productive unit, at least to me. It did the exact opposite. Team work was about 5% of the mission, the other 95% were literally just trying not to get one shotted by shotgun rushers with 2million dps and 6million health and armor. And on top of that, there was a glitch where you could go through a wall using the smart cover that would get you into the play area without really starting the mission, making it so that you could destroy the APC using the sticky launcher.

In the 1.1 update, they ♥♥♥♥ed crafting to hell with making a HUGE increase in the amount of materials needed to craft another material/gear.



They're solution isn't to fix the ♥♥♥♥ ups in THEIR coding, their solution is to ban the people who found a way through their ♥♥♥♥ coding.

They figure out a way to make players go "Hey, that's pretty good" and then make them say "Kill yourself"

The game itself is beautiful and I really like the work that they put into making this New York look so amazing, that seems like the one thing they got right.

In short, I would either not buy the game, wait until EVERY ♥♥♥♥ING THING IS FIXED (BUT WE KNOW THAT ♥♥♥♥ WON'T HAPPEN), or wait until it becomes about $20 in about a year or so.

Ubisoft, fix this steaming pile of ♥♥♥♥.
Fix your ♥♥♥♥ing coding.
Get a ♥♥♥♥ing anti-cheat in place.
Stop adding more clothing packs until you fix what needs to be fixed.
Fix the ♥♥♥♥ing crafting system.
And fix the ♥♥♥♥ing DZ, and I don't mean by adding new brackets, I mean by not making ♥♥♥♥ ridiculously ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ tough to get like some ♥♥♥♥ in the DZ03 vender, you aren't adding any value to the game by forcing people to grind in the ♥♥♥♥ zone until level 90, you are just making them play this copy and paste mission simulator longer.

I finally get into a lobby and everyone says hi
Second I get to the game, glhf boiz
Disconnected from servers
This happens 8 straight times

WHERE IS GOD