Dear Diary,
104 hours later, and I've finally done it. Every nook, every cranny, every last Demiguise statue. My owl is probably filing for retirement, and the Room of Requirement has become my second home - though I wish it had more storage space for all these nearly identical robes.
Phase 1: The Wide-Eyed First Year
"I'll just explore the castle," I said innocently. Next thing I know, I'm scaling towers at midnight, chasing down golden sparkles like a cat after a laser pointer. The paintings started taking bets on which corridor I'd sprint through next, while I frantically tried to decide which of my fifteen identical-but-slightly-different robes to keep.
Phase 2: The Collector's Curse
It began with "just one more" collection. Then suddenly I'm maintaining spreadsheets of beast locations, and my character's wardrobe has more outfit combinations than a fashion week runway - though most differ by just 0.2% stats. The house-elves started leaving energy drinks by my common room door, along with pamphlets about inventory management.
Phase 3: The Completionist's Madness
I found myself talking to every portrait. Twice. Spent three hours rearranging my Room of Requirement because the butterfly placement wasn't "aesthetically optimal." The map became less of a guide and more of a personal challenge - every unmarked spot felt like a personal insult. Meanwhile, my inventory screamed for mercy under the weight of artificially inflated gear variants.
I knew I'd gone too far when I started categorizing real-world plants by their potion ingredients potential. My friends staged an intervention when they caught me trying to levitate my cat while muttering "Wingardium Leviosa."
The house-elves in the game started leaving me concerned notes: "Sir/Madam has been searching for collectibles for 12 hours straight. Perhaps sir/madam would like to... sleep? Or maybe delete some of those identical robes?"
Every spell mastered to the point where I accidentally shout "Accio" at my lost car keys
All beasts collected (my Vivarium is basically Noah's Ark at this point)
Every side quest completed (even the ones the NPCs didn't know they had)
100% completion, and a concerning knowledge of every Demiguise statue location
Inventory management skills that would make Marie Kondo proud
Would I do it all again? Absolutely. Was it worth the concerning amount of time I spent hunting down every last Field Guide page? Without question. Could the inventory system and gear variety use some work? Most definitely. My broom-flying skills are now so precise I could probably thread a needle while doing a barrel roll - if only I had inventory space for the needle.
Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go explain to my boss why I keep trying to summon my work documents with an "Accio" instead of using the printer.
P.S. - To the Demiguise statues: we had a good run, but I never want to see your shimmering, invisible forms again. Unless they add DLC with expanded inventory space. Then I'll be back faster than you can say "Lumos."
Profiler93's Magical Gaming Journey[www.twitch.tv]