ch-ch-cheese mode: activate cheese cheese cheese

bro get the turd out of your mouth what the hell

what in the name of god am i reading right now

nah ♥♥♥♥ you dood

Have you guys seen Axels new steam profile...? ITS A HOT MESS.

nice

I saw Axel pissing into his own mouth the other day. When he saw me he spit his piss at me, screamed, and chased till he could no more.

The other day I saw Axel on the streets. He was still wearing the same clothes I last saw him in, when we all decided to kick him out of our Streamer House. It was his fluffy jacket from Temu with a Nyan chat shirt on underneath, albeit, a lot more poop stained than before. The choice to remove him from our streamer house was unanimous, as Adler, Sage (Token Jew), Tanuki, Hayes, and I all knew our viewers did not like his weird poop fetish. "it's just gotten too out of hand Axel, I'm sorry" Tanuki said to him, as Axel was mumbling under his poop breath. I didn't hear what he said at the time, but I now I know what he was saying: "You. Will. All. Pay". It had been 3 years since we kicked him out, and we have been doing much better without him. We have become the most popular content house on Twitch and Youtube, and we have never been wealthier (except maybe sage (jew money)).

I guess the same could not be said for Axel, as his poop eating habit clearly is still a major issue for him, as can be seen by the log of ♥♥♥♥ in his hand. When he noticed me he began to squeeze it, his poop covered face turning red, and began to chase me. "YOU DID THIS TO ME!" he screamed, throwing his unending supply of poop at me. I could feel it drip down my back. But thats when I saw Sage. She must have been confused why I was running so quickly, but it was already too late for her. I watched as Axel leaped onto her and bludgeoned her body, "YOU ALWAYS LAUGHED AT ME! YOU WERE NEVER THERE FOR ME" He screamed to her lifeless body, still punching at the bits of flesh that were left. The poop that he was carrying in his backpack was flinging everywhere, and it created a ring around her newly made corpse. "One down... Four more to go...".

NUH UH

This guy tried to groom me -rep

As you all know… axel is special to say the least. He wants me to come over tomorrow to “help with his experiments” this guy can not be doing anything normal. Writing this here as a way to tell people where I am if I go missing! I want to have a good time with my buddy of course but I have a feeling that I will be traumatized like the last time. PS only “hang out” with this FREAK because his mom pays me to. If I don’t write back tomorrow assume I’m dead.

(credits to my baby dallin for coming up with the story and writing it! xoxo much jewish love)

Me (sage), Axel (Meatball) And Adler (Adler) were all in my car (I was driving because I just got my license!). We were heading towards the mall, and we were about to buy a bunch of cute clothes and chill out and have a great day. Little did I know that this was going to be the worst day of the rest of my ♥♥♥♥ jew life. "I should NOT have pregamed for this..." Axel says quietly, but we all heard it. "What are you talking about... pregamed how?" Adler asks. "I.. Just kept on eating... I couldn't stop myself...". We hit a slight bump in the road and that's when it happened. Axel shat his pants. You know when something crazy happens to you, and you think that it just has to be a dream. But the smell is a cruel reminder that it isn't a dream, Axel just ♥♥♥♥ his shorts in the backseats of my new car. "Booiiii... Did I really just do that...? LOLZ!

Axel says, like ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ yourself is a normal thing. Most people learn to hold it in before they turn five, but I guess I underestimated Axels stunted growth. It is most likely due to him staring at a screen like its his 9-5 since he was born.

I could only mourn for Adler, who was sitting next to him. The look of disgust that his face made in those moments will be forever ingrained into my mind. But this was only the beginning of the horrors that were yet to happen. Axel, who must be something worse than retarded, leans over, and lets more pour out onto Adler's lap. The air burned, my body was in shock. The smell was the worse thing ever, and FYI Hitler was a guy that existed! I saw my ancestors all looking at me with pity. and these are the ones that died in the holocaust. I never thought I would be envious of those Jews that got gassed. Good job Axel! At this point Adler has been throwing up profusely. "You good brah?". He is crying and screaming, as the ♥♥♥♥ burns through his legs. He begins to throw up more and more until it begins to turn blood red. "It's just a bit dude, you need to chill!" Chill? This FREAK cannot be a real human being.

At this point, adler is dead, and I'm dying very painfully and slowly. Axel on the other hand, "here comes a big one!" is still ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ in the backseat. "Axel close your eyes" "eeerm... Okidoki! Lol." I put my foot on the gas and swerve into a tree, killing us both. Or at least, thats what I thought. Its things like this that make me question my faith. Because MY GOD would have just let me die... Anyways, I wake up in the hospital. I wish I could tell you that I couldn't remember what happened, but you already know that isnt true. "We were able to save you both, but we had to do some... experimental transplants..." It is hard not to find it coincidental that they decided to do an experiment on me of all people, as if we Jews haven't gone through enough.

But then I realized what he just said. "Both...?" Never in my life would I have thought that I would want Adler, my tormenter, to live so badly. It is truely a cruel world we live in, yet it only gets crueler. They don't even give me a second to live in ignorant bliss as they shove a mirror in my face. I see how ♥♥♥♥♥♥ up my life really is. Half of my body has been replaced with his. My... Poor poor face... His face. It disgusts me. "What have you done..." I murmured. "We combined you and your friends functional parts together to keep you guys alive. They great thing is that he still has retained many of his bodily functions!" The word friend felt like a knife, stabbing me deep in my lungs. I try to throw the mirror across the room, soon to realize I have no control over my arms. Axel moves his arms up, and rubs his side of the face. "I think I can get used to this new body..." I feel my stomache begin to grumble...

pasta

(READ FROM BOTTOM UP) Once he was "done" (his 11th bowl) he asked for a box. "You cant have a box for endless pasta, sir..." The waiters face had a slight green tint to it as they were trying not to throw up. "It's... not for the pasta..." Ah Hell nah. its for his ♥♥♥♥ isn't it. My theory was confirmed when he carried it to the bathroom once he got it. "We need to leave!" Adler told me, grabbing my arm and running out. we just told Axel something urgent happened and paid him after. I don't think I can ever eat at olive garden again...

(READ FROM BOTTOM UP) Noises I was all too familiar with. He was ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ his pants. A look of dread rises on Adlers face. The smell immediately made me loose my appetite. "Axel are you ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ yourself?". "yeah... just give me a minute...hhrg!" He rises in his seat as the ♥♥♥♥ escapes. When he was talking about itching... Was he talking about a diaper...? The ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ didnt stop him from shoveling more slop down his gullet though, and he just kept on eating. We needed to leave but we had to split the bill, and he wouldn't let us. I have never wanted to die more than in those moments.

"NOTHING!!!" there is definitely something wrong. At this point im tempted to just leave RIGHT NOW as both me and Adler have gone through some "♥♥♥♥" when it came to Axel. "Chicken Alfredo?"The waiter says "ME!" Axel screeches. They then give him the smile that you give and autistic child. Me and Adler both got are food, yet Axel was already eating. He whispers under his breath "im gonna get my moneys worth...". Me and Adler both chuckle a little and start to eat. In less than 5 minutes his food was gone, already. "WAAAAAIIITER! I NEED MORE PASTA!" Everyone in the restaurant was staring. Our table was in the middle of the room so we were surrounded. At this point I should have just went home, as the worst was yet to come. He ate bowl after bowl of pasta, and while eating his 5th bowl he started making weird noises.

I'm never hanging out with Axel again. So you know how Olive Garden has endless pasta rn...? Well I wanted to go over with some friends to try and eat as much as we could! (biggest mistake of my life.) I went with Adler and Axel, obviously, as Daniel was busy with school work (he had a big project coming up!) We get there and order the pasta, but something was up with Axel... He was tapping the table and scratching a whole bunch. Adler poked at my leg from under the table and text me "Whats wrong with this freak?" I just look over at him and frown slightly, signaling that "I agree with you we really need to drop him as a friend!". "It so itchy..." Axel says. Me and adler turn over to look at him, both of us giving him the same expression (this being what are you talking about?). "You alright? What are you talking about...".

quit the meat riding XD

meatball

There's absolutely NOTHING wrong with eating your own feces.

Here are a list of positives of eating your own ♥♥♥♥!;
1. It tastes DELICIOUS
2. You're recycling, which is good for the enviroment!
3. You spend less money on food
4. You spend less time on making food

These are just some of the top of my head, but seriously! Eating your own poop is really not as bad as my "friends" may tell you it is .

P.S. Adler, I am now living on the streets because of what you did to my business stock, and get to eat others people ♥♥♥♥, so really, I'm even better off than i was before! Thanks!

Am i the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ for ruining my friends business? part 1 of 2

i was over at axels house and we were watching a movie. i wanted some snacks and was super hungry for some chips! turns out i would regret asking for food knowing what this sick freak does now. anyways, i open the chip bag, SEALED btw. I looked at the bag as the name reads "Sharty crisps" and look at some of the very detailed labeling, one which said "flies may vary". Huh, weird i thought to myself and opened the bag. 3 flies come out. Then, the horrific stench fills my nostrils with a smell worse than death. i reluctantly pick up a chip and it is brown, some of you can guess what this is. ITS A POOP CHIP. i throw the bag across the room and realize that axel has been letting his poop crust and picking off the giant flakes to sell them as "food" somehow he had been able to manufacture these at an alarming rate and i quickly realize that people might actually be buying these.

axel quickly runs in the room and screams "WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!!" running to the "chips" that i threw, quickly saying "5 second rule!" and licks them up off of the ground. He looks at me ,his tongue black, covered in floor grease and poop and then says "now where are those flies?" I quickly threw up and realize i have to stop him from selling his own poop. while he is busy looking for the flies i sneak out and destroy all of the hundreds of bags that he had ready to ship. safe to say that me and axel have stopped talking since. Currently i am trying to move ASAP because i see someone lurking outside my house late at night, and i also get these weird notes written in brown ink. i think it was ink anyways. it was also smeared with brown fingerprints making it hard to read. i would say i feel bad but that kid is another level of FREAK.

opps on my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ profile 🖕🖕🖕

#imdiddled

lets just say.. dont ask him how he got the name meatball.

i want this person dead

woah! this profile is really cool

guy reeks of poop. Makes you wonder? (he eats his own poop)

-rep this guy smeared poop into my face and eyes and screamed "EAT IT!!! DONT WASTE IT" at me made me feel uncomfortable... turd in the eyes hurts you know!

not a friendly demo dog -rep

-rep poop eater

another weird story is that i went over to his house to go swimming but when i got there i noticed he had no swimming pool. i was like are we going to a public pool or... and then i see him open his septic tank and dive in head first. what. the. ♥♥♥♥. he was like come on in the water is fine! he said jokingly. i quickly threw up as he started splashing "water" up at me. it was diarrhea. i quickly RAN FOR MY LIFE as he was trying to playfully pull me into the ♥♥♥♥.

Oh, you're wondering why i bring my own toilet paper to Axels house? Let me tell you why.I was at Axels house when i needed to use the restroom. But I saw there was no toilet paper in there so I asked him where it was at. He told me there was none. NONE?! I asked him if he is "joking" but he quickly told me and even insisted that i just "use my hand" and let him lick it clean? I laughed it off as a little joke, but... He clawed at my hand, gripping it with the force of a chimp and told me that he'll even go in there with me! Nah. Thats when I finally knew how much of a freak Axel was. Thank goodness his hand were sweaty from excitement of the thought so I could get him off of me and run for the hills!

ermmm acel is litralee nerd emoji

I was walking up to Axels house to drop off something that he left at my house and I heard something weird coming from inside his room. It was the skibity toilet song so I was a little put off. I decided to take a peek through his window and that's when I saw it. Axel was smearing ♥♥♥♥ all over his walls and body. There were multiple bags of ♥♥♥♥ laying on his bed with various dates on them. But that's when he saw me... He quickly ran outside of his house and started throwing ♥♥♥♥ at me... WTF? He was also screaming out "DONT STEAL MY POOP, YOU DEMON!!!". I quickly ran into my car and skedaddled out of there real quick! My car tires started to slip because there was ♥♥♥♥ covering the tires, so i almost crashed... Didn't know Axel was into... all that... DEFINITELY gonna view him in a different light now....

broefsdgrdf

stinker

I was visiting my "friend" Axel when he looked... a little brown. i asked "are you feeling well" and he replied "I'm feeling good, with poop to spare" i thought he might've just messed up the word poop with another word but im not sure. He recently has been having some withdraws from his poop addiction and ive tried getting him more help but i think he is still on the stuff. Anyways we are hanging out and HIS ARM FALLS OFF. He tries to cover it up by saying "whats over there?!" but i am stunned staring at his arm as he pops it back on. I brush it off but i am still freaked out. You know the phrase you are what you eat? i think Axel is slowly turning into a poop man and my theory is only confirmed as i see his finger turn into a turd. I am super freaked out and rush to the door and Axel flings his poop hand toward me slamming the door shut as he says "leaving so soon?". At that point i was done and left the house and haven't talked to him since.

lol freak

Axel asked if he could borrow one of my pans to cook something. I gave him one cause I am a good friend. Little did I know what he was gonna with it. when he gave it back to me, I was covered in a layer of burnt feces that I could tell he attempted to clean off but failed miserably. "Sorry thats its dirty! " he said with a smile on his face, as if he really thinks that I cant tell what it one the pan. "its fine." I said, quickly leaving as a throw the pan into the trash. That pan was so filthy, it would need a priest with holy water in order to clean that pan. Never letting Axel borrow anything ever again...

freak.

So you all know how me and Axel went on this awesome road trip, right. So this really weird thing happened while we were driving home. So Axel needed to go to the bathroom, right, I did as well. I saw a porta-potty so we stop by it to use it. He goes in first and I wait patiently. He spends a whole 10 minutes in there, so I just assume hes going number two or something. once he leaves, I go in there because I need to take a poop too. I sit down to find that the toilet seat is covered in drool and the inside of it is completely clean. That's a little weird because he was just in here for ten minutes, shouldn't there at least be pee inside of the toilet? But then I go back into the car to find that the whole interior smells like a gas station bathroom. "So we heading out ?" Axel said. There is NO WAY. Did he drink the ♥♥♥♥ and piss inside of the urinal? IS THERE ANY OTHER POSSIBILITY?

So I invited Axel over to my house the other day... BAD IDEA!!! I let him in my room cause we were supposed to hang out then I pointed out that it smelt like poop. He tells me "i'm just imagining it" Hell nah i'm not it smells a sewer in my room and I know dam well my room is squeaky clean. Then I notice there are poop trails from someones shoos (I'm wearing slides) I check under his shoo and there is a big poop under his shoe. I tell him "clean it up by the time I get back from the bathroom. I go pee I spend 2 minutes in bathroom, come out and there I find him, on the floor tracing his poop trail eating and licking his lip with every bite and I just stare at him in disgust and kick him out my house. NEVER INVITE HIM TO YOUR HOUSE!!!!!

The other day I was talking to Axel and I think I saw a fly in his mouth... WHAT DOES THIS KID EAT?!!!