Recent reviews by crab

It genuinely pains me to do this, but I cannot recommend this game in its current state for this price. I got this on sale for 10 dollars which I feel is significantly fairer than the regular $20, but after considering the fact that DLC is being worked on rather than crucial bug fixes, I have a sour taste in my mouth all the same.
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The best thing and worst thing about this game are the very same: its ambition. For the first few hours, this game had me floored with the sheer scope of what it was offering. As a fan of "monster catching" games in general, it seemed like a dream come true, especially after being disappointed in yet another pokemon game. But as I progressed, the plate KEPT filling, and the quality of what was being offered started to drop off significantly. Features I expected to pan out would be shelved for huge swaths of time as more features were piled on.
The best example of this, imo, is the "ride" feature. A player can hop on the back of whichever Monster is currently following you in the over-world. During the first hour or 3, I was blown away. After having tamed a Boss I was not expecting to tame and being THEN able to use him as a mount, I was positively giddy (Giddy-Up even). My mind ran wild with the possibilities and I tried all sorts of things. 30 hours later, it FINALLY does something other than move the same speed as the default sprint button and break the graphics... I can now swim. Supposedly if I dig deeper into the "post-game" I can fly as well.
But that raises my next point...why is there a post-game if the main-game isn't finished, pending DLC notwithstanding? The deeper one goes into the game, the more it unravels. What started as 1 or 2 nps not loading their sprites, or the occasional monster spawning out of bounds, gradually spiraled out of control until I was CONSTANTLY worried about being softlocked out of finishing the game. It was genuinely a surprise when things worked as intended. And through it all there was still MORE. And the more "more" that piled up, the more I began to lose my enthusiasm for the features I fell in love with during my first 10-15 hours. And that saddens me! a lot!
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Listen, I love this game and I genuinely admire SO MUCH about both it AND the developer (yes ONE developer) as well as the whole team involved. The sprites are beautiful and evocative! The world is HUGE and packed with interesting areas, lore creatures, and thoughtful crafting in general. The mechanics and core game play loop are like something out of my dreams.

But the other day after finishing the main story, I began to feel guilty about leaving a glowing positive review. Unfortunately, I feel like that says a lot.

I would LOVE to update this review, trust me. And I plan to... If there are significant (non dlc) fixes or a price drop. Until then, either get the game with the full knowledge that it is essentially unfinished and might stay that way, or just abstain.

Dicey Dungeons is a coffee-break rogue-lite that manages to breathe freshness into a crowded genre by making an unexpected adjustment to the formula: moving randomness to the foreground. With a beautiful art direction and fun quirky premise, this game really shines.

If you're an avid rogue-like enjoyer (you chad, you), you're no doubt familiar with the sting of a bad run. Be it drinking an unidentified potion in OG Rogue that turns you inside out, or getting clashing item drops in Binding of Isaac, that feeling of being at the mercy of inscrutable calculations is probably one of the worst downsides to playing any rogue inspired game, be it "like" or "lite". While it can be a certain kind of fun to make the best of your options and see how far you can get on an empty tank, most people are going to be averse to this feeling. After all, no one likes to feel like a death or loss wasn't their fault.

Color me surprised, then, that a game where random chance is THE defining feature manages to almost wholly mitigate this feeling. I mean, heck, its about talking dice fighting Lady Luck for crying out loud! How could the sting of RNG not be ever present and always looming?? Quite simply, it turns out! By moving the dice rolling out of the background and making it the star of the show, developer Terry Cavanagh (of vvvvvv and super hexagon fame) manages to create a game that makes wins feel meaningful and losses feel acceptable.

Another aspect of the game's charm comes from the 6 sided die specifically being the primary generator of numbers. Battles are turn based and each turn begins with you rolling a number of 6 sided dice based on your current character level for the dungeon. Then, the dice can be dragged to different equipment cards which vary in effect and requirement, in order to activate a specific skill. Skills range from doubling the number on a die, dealing damage equal to the die x2 (but only if its a 4 or less), or applying a specific effect but only by placing a 2. By making each different skill/equipment require a different mindset to most optimally utilize, one finds that any roll of the dice can be turned into an advantage with the right smarts, not just hoping for all 6s every time. By subverting the typical mechanic of "high good, low bad", Dicey Dungeons creates an environment where the player feels mostly in control despite the abundance of randomness at play.

Here are a few more thoughts, pros, and cons, to the game:
+ Awesome soundtrack with bouncy chiptunes
+ Colorful and creative monster designs
+ Silly dialogue which is hammy, but in a good way.
+ High skill ceiling, low skill floor.
+ Gamepad and key-mapping support
+ Looks great in motion and feels good to interact with
+ Cheap Pricetag!
+ the game is "alive" and still being worked on as of this writing.

- not super immersive, if that matters to you
- game DOES crash every so often at the time of this writing, but I can't say for sure that isnt an issue with my specs (graphics card has seen better days)
- very much a -Lite rather than a -Like. If you want crunch, this probably isn't the game for you. (Hey buddy, I think you've got the wrong game, the Tales of Maj'Eyal page is two blocks down)
- randomness is still very much at play. If getting a bad dice roll fills you with unquenchable rage, no amount of cutesy dialogue with Lady Luck will change your mind.
- the game uses "dice" as a singular noun all the time..... its die. 1 die, many dice. This is petty as ♥♥♥♥ and shouldnt bother me, but a monster said "douse" was the plural of dice and it made me physically ill.

If you enjoy turn based battles, deck builders, tabletop dice games, dungeon crawling and silliness, give this one a shot!

When I started playing D2 I would have easily recommended it. As someone who started playing during the "new light" era, aka the shift from Blizzardvision to Steam, it felt like the game was dripping with value. Lusciously rendered worlds, surprisingly engaging story, and great gun-play hooked me into playing pretty much every day. So, naturally, after a good hundred or so hours of f2p, I invested in a dlc, Forsaken, which I loved.

Now all that is either gone, or could be gone at any moment thanks to the new "vaulting" practice. The story campaign has all the beginning parts removed and whole beautiful worlds are unexplorable. In fact, I've basically been reverted to an f2p player since the only currently active dlc is expensive and shallow, something that would have been bad on a good day. But not only that, they can yoink any of THAT content away at a moment's notice as well? Why would I invest time or money in a game that is literally eroding content? Not to mention the FOMO treadmill system that the game barely bothers disguising now is straight up depressing.

I realize the logistical or business reasoning behind some of these decisions, but as a customer I kind of don't give a ♥♥♥♥. This is all the worst parts of MMO mismanagement with typical ♥♥♥♥♥♥ "trrrrrrriiiiiiipple aaaaaaaaaaaa" live service garbage.

Just go play halo or borderlands.

Firstly, I really like this game and I return to it quite often in the 8 years since I bought it.
But lets get one huge thing clear right out of the gate here: This is a NOT a "god game". If you go into this game looking to experiment with the wonders of nature and bend a world to your whims, you will probably be disappointed. Essentially, this is a puzzle game where one must balance many different statistics, some good some bad, while trying to make the most out of a finite amount of game space.

The core struggle of the game comes with your interaction with the humans of your little globe. Once settlements begin to form they will ask your gods for X amount of resource (either tech, food, or wealth) to utilize within their borders. However, the Greed bar will rise if they get what they want too fast which can potentially cause them to go bananas and start murdering your gods, ending the game prematurely.

Balancing optimization with speed makes a really interesting and unique dynamic which has lots of different solutions depending on the types of towns you end up with. Notice I said "end up with" there. Human's whims are random and often clash with your own goals which can lead to some frustrating moments you wouldnt usually have in a so called "god game".
For instance, lets say that you want an achievement for a town having 1000 food in use since every achievement is tied to a game advancement. So you set up your game, get your world built and all the humans ask for is... rocks. Bad news boss, that chievo aint happening. Thats frustrating and honestly the opposite of how a god game should make one feel.

Luckily the puzzle aspect is super unique and interesting. Each time you play is representative of an "era" of the planet's life-span and as such is timed. After either 30, 60, or 120 minutes of unpaused gameplay, the gods go to sleep. So as soon as you hit start, theres a feeling of mild urgency which I enjoy. The map is always the same size and it is up to you to decide how the lands are arranged. Certain terrains are habitable while others are not, so how you set up your planet in the first 5 minutes can shape your whole 2 hour arc.

The real meat comes after the set up phase though, when humans begin putting forth projects which require more and more strict use of their lands. Each space within a town's border can house 1 natural resource and each of your 4 gods can make different things. The puzzle aspect enters the fray with individual resources requiring what they be placed strategically near other types of resources to be utilized. For instance, a square with Salt Mines can be boosted by having minerals on either side of it, but it won't work unless you already have 10 food points in use.

Even more interesting is the god upgrade system. Every time you help the humans, you get to upgrade a god, but each god can only have 4 upgrades total. This means you can never get everything in 1 play through. On top of that, only the god with the least upgrades is available to be upgraded further, so the order of upgrades and to which god they go to can drastically change your capabilities from game to game.

And thats Reus. Its a fun head-scratcher and spread sheet simulator, but it absolutely does NOT make you feel god like or powerful. I absolutely recommend it if what I described sounded fun. If not, I hope I saved you some time and money. Its not for everyone, but I think its worth a spin.

Disregard the top negative reviews, yall. For awhile I was of that mind as well, but the latest update (or perhaps one of the last few) really tightened up the game into something seriously special. The gameplay is now buttery smooth and snappy to boot. The devs are actively listening and adjusting the game and its all the better for it.

Props to yall.

If you've ever been interested in the Binding of Isaac but hated that it looks like barf (and you can't tell me it doesn't lol), this may very well be the game for you. Not only does it look gorgeous in stills, but it animates beautifully. Everything is incredibly charming and the attention to detail is admirable and impressive.

Hardcore Isaac-heads may not find the difficulty up to their caliber, but I for one have been enjoying the respite from isaac's cruelty. Carelessness will still get you killed, but there is much more leeway. Bullets move a pinch slower on average and are much more easily distinguishable from enemy fire, not to mention you have more health in general. The whole game is just less hostile.

Give it a shot!

This is it.

This is, in my opinion, the best roguelike on the market. ToME is an incredibly deep and strategic RPG/roguelike which takes place in an insanely lore-rich world of classic high fantasy.

The game is strategic in that time moves in "turns", meaning time ceases to move between actions or movements. This allows you to carefully plan each action, rather than requiring twitch reflexes. If you want fast paced action, look elsewhere. Animation is minimal, yet the graphics are extemely charming, and convey quite clearly everything that is happening.

Character creation is rich, deep, and super flexible, albeit extremely complex. I've played the same class a million times, but the result is always different depending on how I lay out the stats and skill points, which is probably my favorite part. I am constantly finding fun and oddball builds which get a million times farther than I expect. If you like making characters for tabletop rpgs you'll love this ♥♥♥♥.

The difficulty is pretty brutal, but it always feels fair. There are ways to turn this down for chickens, or up farther for masochists and vets. As you play, you get better at making characters and becoming better at survival. But there are a TON of things to unlock too. There are different classes, races, and starting items to unlock in addition to "campaigns", which are essentially different game modes. If you get bored of adventuring around the continent, turn on endless dungeon mode. Tired of that? Arena mode is a blast too.

Basically, this game is insanely fun, super challenging (and therefore rewarding), and the world is written with a very tasteful degree of seriousness. Humor can be found in dialogue but it is subtle and never breaks the immersion (no memes thank the lord.)

If you enjoy roguelikes and don't have this game, do yourself a favor and cop it! If you like it, go get that dlc too. My best character so far has been a halfling doombringer. if that doesnt convince you I dont know wat will

Imagine a beat-em-up with no insentive to beat-em-up. Like at all. No fun moves or powerups or drops or anything. Now imagine everytime you do ANYTHING a horrible screeching voice makes an unfunny joke. Are you crying yet? Well its not over. The controls are an actual nightmare and there are a lot of stupid and painful platforming bits to "spice up" the otherwise groan-inducing combat sequences and uninspired bossfights. The character design is the only thing that is even remotely acceptable.

Any amount of money for this trainwreck is too much. Do not purchase.

The screen-shots and description really don't do this justice. Its a really really fun marriage of classic arcade style gameplay with modern complexity and depth. The difficulty is challenging in a way that feels incredibly fair and never frustrating, and the replay value is practically infinite. No 2 games will ever pan out exactly the same, even on levels you're revisiting or with a character you've already used. Speaking of characters, each one has a distinct and fun playstyle that really encourages you to try new tactics rather than good ol' run/gun. Achievements unlock characters and items too! This is just a really fun game.

A true underrated classic! A little dated at this point, but it really just needs some minor control tweaking. Trapped in 480p but otherwise, its fun as hell.

Everything I wanted Diablo III to be.