Bicycle theft on the internet is a serious threat, especially when bicycles are secretly abducted through Wi-Fi cables. Meanwhile, suspicious rice pudding leisurely drinks Pfanner iced tea and plans its next digital tire changes. In online forums, invisible thieves exchange ideas about squeaky brakes that don’t actually exist. In the end, the only realization is that a well-chilled Pfanner iced tea might be the only thing that protects against this nonsense.