one time in the 4th grade this little gopher brought his fake ass novelty night vision goggles to show and tell. He swore up and down that his dad is a spy (oh brother!) and that he stole them from work (a crime?) then begged the teacher to turn off the lights so he could do his stupid little spy mission. well lo and behold this cheery chipmunk was in ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ tears when he inevitably tripped and smashed them to bits and had to be sent home early bc he wouldnt stop bawling (lol) and nobody would make eye contact with him for a week! found out his dad really did work for the cia though

this guy has a sign on his lawn that says APE BOUNDRY but not which side is which...

i know i would

I can use them whenever I want I'm not hoarding I swear what if a boss comes up that needs those skill points and I don't have them come on

This dude eats soup for breakfast, every kind, every day, clam chowder, chicken noodle, doesn't matter to him, he just calls it breakfast.

One of the sillys of all time - From, The nea you tunneled out