The Baron Of Basil as well as the Viscount of Veloute have deployed their most prized armiers to the front. The Marquess Of Mullet has embarked an air rsistance of Jellied Jarvies to your location with jeweled supplies of Royal Kingspice. Over.

A line to be remembered comrade, the Verified Instagram Models are posing in mirrors however will be on the front in your aid shortly. We have equipped them with covert spicethrowers (mark VI) and a cargobob containing our prized all spice. I believe your well known Basil Berserkers will prove excellent in removing the tofu barriers the tyrant blanders have set up. Over.

Calling Grottomen janissaries to the front and many more troops as well. We shall flood them with water from our cool grottos and drown them in spice!

A transmission.. the instagram hotdog. YES! their mustard powder has penetrated the barriers... all systems online waiting for your reply comrade, over. Seasoriflemen sent to you sector for an uncounted-defensive. Over.

No.. no this cannot be. The Naval Autonomical Fleet has been vanquished.. what is happening.
The Seasoned earth crumbles art my heel to tasteless ashes.. it is done. Wait.. wait I have two reports from sector 55, Miro is out in the open! One slip of spice can end the suffering of our people! We need the help of the Grottomen and the might of the Verified Instagram Models if we have any chance for this.. ..Do you read? I repeat, do you read?

Great speech, comrade, but we must push on. Our enemy is close to finishing the weapon, and unleashing it will be devastating. We must destroy the base which contains said weapon, and we must get back before they can reorganize and launch a counter-offensive.

Grottoman out

We have a code 69, repeat code 69. It's time my spicers, for the ultimate.
Seasannihilator-GTX09 deployed for section 420 (your co-ordinates). It will come on our prized interject rosemaries, Mark XIV. Cargobobs to your sector. We have one chance for this, if we succeed... Miro will be defeated once and for all. The only way is a 1 on 1 toothpick duel.. If I don't make it out seasoned.. tell my relishes I never really liked them. Admiral Calamari.. signing out. You made me proud my men, our grandseasons will remember today as the day we banish the Miro from our land and the Blanding scum that salts our lands. One for all, one for the sacred lands of seastopia and the spicy subterranean Calador. Iron.. from spice.

thank you-- greatly appreciated--

our enemies, the Blanders, they're making an ultimate superweapon.

to turn all spicy things tasteless.

grottoman reporting in.

deep in enemy territory-- just uncovered secret--



send help

Ah yes, sure thing however you may you may need to redirect your request to the leading
snack department in your sector, there you will find foods for all your seasoned needs.

Is that a good thing or a bad thing? The babis team hasn't been deployed in years, I need a coonfirmation as we have no babi troops on our records. If they become hostile defend the Spice Cannon with your life, it's power of the spice cannot be harnessed by the unspice, I am sending a research team to be escorted by a mark IV Papacalzone cannoneer as backup.

Sure thing sir, I have completed all however route 8 is infested by wild miros and my men cannot persue further. A reinforcement team would be much obliged, thank you. Sending the co-ordinates now...

Aye aye, glad to have you aboard spicer, we have a problem at station V! paprika shipments, It would be most adequate if you could work on the transmission jammer on route 8 too, good luck new spicer and a good spice to you.

Lieutenant Mr.Rock reporting for duty, I would like to give a short introduction, I am a grade VI spicer and I am very happy I have been invited aboard. Good seasoning to all. I am currently repairing our Predator drones however I will be on the battlefield shortly, wish me luck.

Search Operators inbound, we have visual on two grade IVM contrabrand mirolium crates.
Sending scavenger crew in 3.. 2.. 1.. code six we have a visual sending transmission.

I have sent R-0CK squads, lead by Mr.Rock to Issa's main base.

Yes, lieutenant. The co-ordinates appear to be 56 -667 -04.
As soon as you clear the area head to site 29 a population of issa havee been terrorising the civilians. Liberate all outposts in that sector, same goes for site 29.

Y-Yes, The Pepplin is on way awaitin oders, our Supreme Chancellor CCP would like to talk to you on 'skype'

I need two anti-minimiro mortars at -89 -655 +56, sendinng co-ordinates.
All stations online, the Pepplin is at the ready awating your call for detonation of basilbombs.

Roger roger.


Sending in Thymecopters. They're ready for anything.

It's a code 9 we need a reinforcement of chirrocopters - Calamisiles inbound watch your tail.

Oregano located?

Seasorifles at the ready! As-salt Squad 1 inbound!

A reward well deserved, I would like to discuss this further though because of the current seasobetrayal situation I have more pressing matters to attend to.
My unending apologies, Seasomoderator.

YEEEEEEESS!



I would like to thank my comrades in spice to get me through the tough times, and the Salty Seasoners for getting me to Gold level in CS:GO (Counter Spice: Global Oregano). Thank you so much, and good night!

W E H A V E A W I E N E R !
F I S S I O N M A I L E D !

R O H I N E





W H O W O N T H E S P I C E S T O R I E S ?



R E P O S T T O N O T G E T S P O O P E D B Y S P O O P G O D ÔÅÎ˚´≈ΩÂ≈≤ϘÎ

In your sharp unseasoned ass.
No jk go onskypw tho

★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★
D O N T T O U C H T H A T ! ! !

S P O R T I C U S ! ! !

W H A T A R E Y O U D O I N G ! ?



Also, who won the spice stories contest?

A L E X X X ! ! !

D O N T T O U C H T H A T ! ! !

*Grabs xxx_PR0r4nn0r14_xxx*

Hey I'm asian.



From Indonesia.



The Spice Islands.

We'll have to see! GET THE ASIANS HURRY!

What!?

I'll get the Spice-o-First regiment!

Sugar, okay get the disposable cumin satchets and close all containers.
We have an Oregarat at our feet be wary! Evacuate the parsley people!

C R U N C H

xd

D O N ' T T O U C H T H A T !

This is going down in history If you wanna be a Villain Number One You have to chase a superhero on the run
Just follow my moves, and sneak around Be careful not to make a sound Shh No, don't touch that!
We're Number One Hey! We're Number One
Ha ha ha Now look at this net, that I have found When I say go, be ready to throw Go! Throw it on him, not me! Uh, let's try something else
Now watch and learn, here's the deal You slip and slide on this banana peel Ha ha ha, gasp! what are you doing!?
ba-ba-biddly-ba-ba-ba-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba We're Number One Hey! ba-ba-biddly-ba-ba-ba-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba We're Number One ba-ba-biddly-ba-ba-ba-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba We're Number One Hey! ba-ba-biddly-ba-ba-ba-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba We're Number One Hey! Hey!

Here's a little lesson in trickery

No problem, happy seasoning!

K ,Thanks for the tip.

As a matter of fact, I have found orange paprika most unplesaant on asians.
Unless you are seasoning latinos, I suggest using the yellow one.

Ah! An interesting question indeed. We have countless recipes on our beta forums but for a quick answer I would say light soy sauce, splash of dark teriyaki and a pinch of yellow paprika, which can be purchased at our beta seaso-store.

How to season asians?

Any mispellation of seasonings will result in permanent ban.

We thank you for your support.